i'm sorry

Hey Dad look at me

Think back and talk to me

Did I grow up according

To plan?

Do you think Im wasting

My time doing things I

Wanna do?

But it hurts when you

Disapprove all along

And now I try hard to make it

I just want to make you proud

Im never gonna be good

Enough for you

I cant pretend that

Im alright

And you cant change me

Cuz we lost it all

Nothing lasts forever

Im sorry

I cant be Perfect

Now its just too late

And we cant go back

Im sorry

I cant be Perfect

I try not to think

About the pain I feel inside

Did you know you used to be

My hero?

All the days

You spent with me

Now seem so far away

And it feels like you dont

Care anymore

And now I try hard to make it

I just want to make you proud

Im never gonna be good

Enough for you

I cant stand another fight

And nothing alright

Cuz we lost it all

Nothing lasts forever

Im sorry

I cant be Perfect

Now its just too late

And we cant go back

Im sorry

I cant be Perfect

Nothings gonna change

The things that you said

Nothings gonna make this

Right again

Please dont turn your back

I cant believe its hard

Just to talk to you

But you dont understand

Cuz we lost it all

Nothing lasts forever

Im sorry

I cant be Perfect

Now its just too late

And we cant go back

Im sorry

I cant be Perfect

Cuz we lost it all

Nothing lasts forever

Im sorry

I cant be Perfect

Now its just too late

And we cant go back

Im sorry

I cant be Perfect

nothin

dont know what to write about.

just too many things in my head.

thanks for spending some time.

and the most important thing,

thanks a lot to you,

green-wrapped vanilla icecream. =)

the year, the blog

31 dec 2009.

means that its the last day of the year. i dont know how i feel. so many things happened to me in this year. for me, the things are just more to not good things. maybe i can count the good things happened to me. one of the bad 'thing' happened to me in this year is i faced an accident with a car in a couple of days before my birthday. my birthday gifts are scares on my hands and all.. pathetic eh?

[ cian ko.. makin x encem ko yang mmg x encem tu dah.. haha.. ]

and yeah one of the reason i didnt update this blog is none of good things happened to me lately.. i dont think i want myself read only bad things happened to me in the 'past' when i read this posts back years after. haha.. [ pape la afe.. ]

this blog.. i just made for myself to read again and remember what happened to me. since ive no diary and it just because i think im too lazy for having that thing, and i guess these posts can function the way as diary does, i can memorize back what happened to me before. plus, no one should know who is that 'kash|afe' since i didnt mean to make this posts for public

[ sbb tu ak x letak nama sbna dlm ni. huhu.. ]

well, now some of my friends do know about this blog. haha..

about kash afe; kash is just the name of one of the cartoonists i like and that name kinda kool anyway. and afe, once people used to call me that. it used to be my nickname. ( for several persons ) and i kinda like it. but now, no one do nick me with that. i still remember, my friends used to call me with only a single nick that is, 'cat' at school. neko, kucing, kittun or anything that symbolizes a cat. because i like cats very much ? i guess..

[ or sbb asal nampak kucin je aku yang pegi kaco dulu kucin tu? huhu ]

and yeah talk about cats, this evening an armed-long-sized cat happened to meet me before i went out to beach. i thought it was a wild huge cat but it was very tame. kool tho. ill get it into my room if i see him again. haha..

its the last day of the year, and all i do here is write about this blog. not connected at all. maybe because in this year i created my own first blog?

[ x habis2 mngarut ko ni afe.. ]

whatever it is.. happy new year and i wish 2010 is a better year for me and for everyone.

2010.. here i come..

happy birthday

its 13 dec again,

for this time it already turned me into 18 years,

and its a lot more numbers for you,

you have always been there for me,

even when i did not make it easy for you,

even when i did dissapoint you at some points,

you stood by me and made me feel safe and welcome,

even though i am not very good with words,

today i would like to say thank you.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you..

dad. =)

storm warriors

malas nak taip pasal ape yang berlaku around me. there was a thing that made me felt so down tho. whatever it was, storm warriors sangat best.

the poster of the koolest two brothers

aku makin letih.. selamat malam blog.

deserve

the night class of islamic studies 2 really turned my face all red. because of not remembering the surah we need to memorize for the given time, i got like a 'punch' from ustaz that sounds like ''this stupid kid didnt remember a thing" ( of coz he didnt say that, it just me thinkin that way )

me just memorized the half of the whole page we need to remember, means i failed then. [ you really do stupid afe ]

its good not all of them know im from smka i guess. i think it might true when people say, you dont look like a smka student. i think me not deserve to be called one of them tho. memalukan nama skolah agama je!

not feeling good. i really hope me learnt from this mistake. again i mean.

me sux..

selamat malam blog

the text message

that day, nothin special happened to me. it was a dull, common day for me as me myself not even in the mood of happy or unhappy. until my mobile phone vibrated, made a signal of receiving a text message. i opened it ;

"it was the first time we walked together..

nice, wasn't it.

but it was nicer when u gave me that gift, a smile.

tomorrow, or sooner when i no longer can walk,

i want you to be the only one who accompany me.

at this moment, i cannot call upon your name anymore like i used to.

only you should come to me.

too, at this moment i want one more gift from you.

but this time, not your smile anymore.

i want a recite of Al-Fatihah from you.

because i no longer can do that by my own.

and when there are people placing me below the long stiff planks,

promise me, don't you ever cry.

because i can't call upon your name, anymore.."

what happened next.. no one should know other than me.

p/s : it supposed to be in malay language, but i translate it into English. no wonder errors are everywhere..